Monday, September 24, 2007

I have it!!


I have the internet now, wow!!!! I don't have the hawaii pics on my computer yet, and my hubby took the camera with him, so I will try to do that tonight. I don't know why I am in a hurry, I look miserable in them, but I will post them!!

Here is my little journal entry for the day!!!

Is it normal to feel depressed every day when you are sick and prego? Not only do I wake up everyday feeling like I have the flu, I think that for 8 weeks straight I have felt this way, I am not going to lie, it is taking a toll on me and my emotional state. I want so bad to have like 5 minutes of my normal, active self back. I try everything but nothing works. I love that I am pregnant, but this is taking away from the specialness of it.

I feel like I am going through that weird awkward high school puberty phase. I am growing boobs for the first time, all my shirts that have stripes no longer are straight, the swirl over them, and words now stretch over them, very weird to me, I want my NO boobs back!! It may be exciting to get them if everything else was staying small, but it is not. I attempt to go walking, but for a person who is used to working out and running as much as I did it is not doing a darn thing, all my clothes are much to tight already for only being 13 weeks. I bet I way 200 lbs before I am done. I still can't go to the bathroom, I have maybe gone 5 times total in 2 months, and not a lot. Can I just say I look 5 months prego from that alone, it makes me sick, literally. But nothing is helping. That may seem like to much info, but you are getting an ear full today.

Last, what the heck is with my acne face, eeewww! I look like one of the spokespersons for proactive, the before photo's. Can I just say I have never felt this bad. What is wrong with me, I was like oh it wil be fun to be pregnant, get fat and get boobs, not that way at all, I am freaking out, but at the same time to sick to give two hoots about fixing it. Wow, sorry if this is to much info but you just have to get it out sometimes, and girls tend to understand better than boys you know!!!

On the other hand, our house is starting to come along, I will post some pics, it is slow but sure. I love my husband, he works so hard, and is doing so awesome, I can't begin to tell you how good it feels to just feel secure and to know everything will be ok, in all aspects of our lives. I am not as miserable as I may sound, truly, I love life.
And I love the Rain and cold weather, even though I drive 30 minutes to work everyday, and when snow comes I get really scared, I am ready for sweater and pant weather for sure!!! I loev my back yard, this is a pic of it, it is surrounded by trees and ivy, and I love it, I can't wait to work on it next year!

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

Nichole! you are totally normal firs off! I TOTALLY felt that way at first. I'm not going to kid you on this one. The first trimester for me was the worst. Actually until your belly actually "pops" (around 5 months) you just feel fat like in a different way.A thick full way. I hated it because my jeans didn't fit after like 4 months. I was thinking oh great! Imagine what I'll look like each month!
That feeling goes away and you get a real CUTE belly that is much better because you can wear clothes feeling pregnant and not just fat or too thick for comfort!
I broke out like a mad man at first too and then my skin magically cleared up the rest of my pregnancy. About 4 months and it cleared right up. I know some women's skin is the best when they are prego or the worst....Hopefully it clears up for you. It's all the hormones going crazy in your body.

I am so sorry you are still feeling so terrible, that is not fun. Definitely would ruin the excitement of pregnancy.

I think it is normal for you to feel a little depressed if you think about what you've been going through every single day that would make anyone depressed. Your life just got turned upside down.
it will get better and better and then it will be over,

Just remember you can get your body back when it's all over. Well, I didn't fully but about 98%

Anonymous said...

WOAH, sorry that was a long one!

Anonymous said...

Oh, and you need to eat FIBER to go # 2 woman! You'd probably drop 5 lbs. if youcan't eat much then ask your doc what supplement he suggests like Citracil or Metamusil???

RHETT AND NICHOLE said...

Thanks a lot, I know it will pass, I am not a patient person, so this is dragging for sure!

Tasha said...

Wow! that scares me from rushing to get prego! I'm sure it is worth it though!

Jake said...

Nichole...
We find out this Thursday what the sex is... Can't wait! I too am feeling just miserable. Not morning sick anymore but my back is killing me and I'm only 20 weeks!! It hurts to even stand up and walk...I seriously can't sleep at all at night, I pee like 5 times during the night, I still can't get off the pot with ya know... I am having cramping in my abdomen every stinkin day, and the Dr. says it's all normal. And on top of that, I have a happy trial from the top of my stomach clear down. We're talking black hair. (Like I could comb it it's so bad.) Oh the joys of being prego! I too thought I would just love it!! But, in the end it's worth it... thats what I keep telling myself.
Hang in there kidd-o. It'll be over before we know it. Heck, I'm already half way there!! And your already 3 months!!
Get feeling better!
I'm sure you look great even though you don't feel it.

Jocelyn said...

WHO COMPLAINS ABOUT BOOBS!!!? Boy oh boy I would love a nice rack! haha! Lucky dog! Oh nichole...I wish I could offer you some magical advice on this whole thing! but I've never been pregnant! Crazy I know! It does sound absolutely miserable though!! Especially not being able to be active! that would kill me the most too! I am POSITIVE you still look amazing pregnant! Hang in there!!

The Jones Family said...

Nichole-
I totally know how you feel about your body- you will be going through some serious changes in the next while but at least you will get a belly and then you won't feel chubby- you'll feel pregnant. The 2nd trimester is the best- trust me. At least you may look like your prego because you are- I already had a baby and still have the prego belly! Hang in there- the baby is worth all the crap your body has to go through!

Camie said...

Nichole,

I am sorry for you miscomforts. If it helps I am in pretty much the same situation as you. Don't get depressed (not as easy as it sounds I know.) The first stages of pregnancy are so awkward and miserable. I don't have any real words of wisdom other then its so worth it at the end. The moment you hold that baby you will forget all the things you went through to get it here. Think about how difficult it is to think about baby #2 when you can vividly remember your pains from your first pregnancy...just know that the good outweighs the bad like a bagillion to one! Hang in there.

Lindsey Lee said...

Darnit...hang in there girly. My sickness went away at 4 months, so hopefully you are almost there! Its hard to feel good while preggo but the 2nd trimester is MUCH better. Enjoy your body changing because its ALL for that little baby. It will ALL be worth it soon, i promise! pretty soon (hopefully the 2nd and 3rd trimesters) will bring you more energy and pretty glowy skin. Hang in there!!

Anonymous said...

Nichole, I promise it will get better, and I can bet you are still a skinny little thing. Trust me, all of us mom's know what you are going through. It is not the most fun. It is so exciting in the months to come. Finding out the sex, seeing the ultrasound, feeling that little baby kick you tell you are raw. It will all be worth it in the end, and then some how we are all crazy and do it again for another bundle of joy.

Kelli Eudis said...

Hey Nichole hang in there..it'll get better I promise!! You are beautiful and I saw pics of you on Tara's page and you don't even look pregnant! The reward is great. Just hang in there and have fun with it. You will be just as beautiful, only with a little belly, which I think is stinkin' cute!

Brianna said...

Wow thanks for the birth control for the next few months...at least! Just kidding, I am so sorry that you feel so horrible. I wish I could do something for you. Rhett said you guys would be around this weekend so maybe we'll try to come down at some point so Nick can see your house. Feel better! Oh and I would like my hair done sometime next week if we can work it out.

Rachel said...

nichole-i am so sorry you are still felling sick! it is absolutely miserable, i know! how far along are you now? i started feeling better about 21-23 weeks. also you need to tell your doctor you need zofran or reglan (sp?) it should help. the 1st tri is for sure the worst, it is totally normal all the symptoms you are having. i really think you are having a girl from everything you are experiencing just a theory i have, if you are carrying a girl your body goes through all the emotions of a girl, ie..emotional, depressed, acne, etc, etc. if you are carrying a boy it is the opposite. i don't know, but it makes sense to me....i hated the awkward stage of feeling fat where you wern't showing at all but you felt like an elephant. i was always just wanting my belly to pop out so people would know i was preg. not just fat. we all go through it so we all understand how you feel. it does get better and it is worth it! you will forget all your misery when you hold that sweet innocent baby! nothing can measure up to that!

Jonathan, Kaity & Halle said...

It's always said that we are our harshest critic! Nichole we all saw Tara's Hawaii pics and you look HOT! You have nothing to worry about! I'm sorry you're not feeling well. I don't think i'll be able to handle pregnancy. Can't wait to see pics of your house. Yay for you guys!!

Anonymous said...

Oh and that back yard is gonna be the BOMB for a toddler.....Your baby will love having a place to run around!

Cassidy Legg said...

Nichole keep this diary of yours going. So whenever I think I might want a kid I can just click on in here and change my mind! No but really I am sorry for the sickness hope it turns around soon. Your backyard is awesome you will have some fun BBQ's back there.

RHETT AND NICHOLE said...

I hope I dont make you want to have kids, I don't mean to complain either, it is just this is all that I have going on right now, so I write about it, it will change soon! Sorry! I will try to be more up beat from now on. I do appreciate the comments though they are all very helpful!

The Jones Family said...

Are you having an ultrasound anytime soon? How many weeks along are you now? I started to feel better aroung 16 weeks, but I wasn't nearly as sick as you have been. And don't worry everything you are feeling is normal, and we have all gone through it too. Just hang in there- there is an end to all of what you are experiencing!